Realized My Thorn

In 2 Corinthians, Paul writes of a "thorn" placed in his flesh, "a messenger of Satan sent to harass him." Many scholars think this "thorn" was some sort of blindness. It's point was to keep him from becoming conceited and show Christ's power for, His power "is made perfect in weakness."

I've often wondered what my thorn could be.  Ever since I was exposed to toxic mold six and a half years ago, I've had a lot of physical ailments, some very persistent, that force me to rely on Christ's power. Most however have resolved within six months or a couple years though. But one symptom has never left me; even before the mold, it has plagued me.

Migraines. 

As I lay in bed last night, whimpering because I was in so much pain, I felt all my power stripped away from me. I'd been doing so well; the usual time I get a migraine had passed and I thought it was because of how well I was taking care of myself that I had dodged the bullet. I had grown conceited, thinking it was my own work, my own will power and discoveries, that was healing me. This migraine has reminded me it's not me; it's all God. He is my healer, and I have been proud.

This migraine has scoured me of my pride and forced me to rely upon my Lord again. My pride made me lazy, made me feel invincible, and so I slipped up as evidenced in the post previous. God is reminding me He is my Sustainer, my Shield, my Protector. He wants to reveal His power in my weakness; He will not give His glory to another.

And so, though I still ask Him to heal me of my thorn, I will also thank Him and praise Him for it. It is bringing Him honor by removing my sin and displaying His glorious strength. May it be so; amen.